Sequel Planned to the Kosher Guide: The Goyim Guide

The Kosher Guide to Imaginary Animals has been so popular already, despite not officially being released until tomorrow, that we’ve already been commissioned by Tachyon to do a sequel, aimed at a more general audience.

—Will include 90 entries on different types of “tainted meat” throughout history.

–Copious and mouth-watering illustrations by John Coulthart, who designed the first book.

–Evil Monkey’s discussion with Ann and with a third party, Mord, pictured below.

–Extended recipes discussion between Ann and chef Bobby Flay on the best way to serve “bloat meats”.


(Mord)

Excerpt from the Entry on “A Diseased Sow on Cobblestone Street, Frankfurt, 1502”:

Evil Monkey: Is it suitable for goyim consumption? Pig is pig, no?

Ann: I’m Jewish, how would I know?

Mord: ALL SHUT UP. SHUT UP. DEVOUR SOW. DEVOUR MONKEY. DEVOUR ALL. THE END.

17 comments on “Sequel Planned to the Kosher Guide: The Goyim Guide

  1. Larry says:

    If that book were available, I’d read and review it. I pray there are no references to rabid squirrel consumption?

  2. Well, it’s not available yet–we just announced it!

  3. Larry says:

    Of course! I just meant if it were available, not when it is available. Or so I think, I think…

  4. You know, a lot of people are going to be reading this entry for the first time on April 1st.

    Just sayin’…

  5. Dianne says:

    Very cool, what an interesting idea!

  6. Samuel S says:

    I’ll definitely buy it, ;-)

  7. Greg Bossert says:

    buy it? heck, i’d eat it; gotta love a steaming slice of book. even if it is rabid. and bloated.

  8. Hellbound Heart says:

    i bet you love it when ann chases you around the kitchen with an egg flipper (nudge nudge wink wink)….

    peace and love….

  9. Hellbound Heart says:

    oh man oh man oh man……jeff, do yourself a monumental favour and log onto steve kilbey’s blog site and have a listen to one of the church songs that’s on the upcoming deadman’s hand ep……
    you seeing the church while they’re on tour in the u.s.?

    peace and love…..

  10. Felix Gilman says:

    I will eat Literally Anything, regardless of cleanliness, cloven or uncloven of hoof, feathered or batwinged or scaled, up to and including The Great God Pan and/or Jormungandr

    no gods, no masters, no dietary laws

  11. Larry says:

    But would you eat the Feathered Gingrich, Felix?

  12. Felix Gilman says:

    I will

    there is nothing in all the world uncleaner than a Gingrich, but I’ll eat it regardless

    I am goyim, hear me belch

  13. Larry says:

    What about a Coulter Cod or a Mustacheoed Hitler? Would you eat them in a box? Would you eat them with a fox?

  14. Felix Gilman says:

    Literally Any Thing

  15. Larry says:

    Even the flesh of a Pope? :O

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