Breaking News: Penguin Wars Intensify–The Arrival of the Sinister “Mr. P”

Some readers of this blog may recall Sir Tessa’s infamous penguin post, followed by escalation, followed by neon yellow penguins in Prague. Well, Sir Tessa has once again intensified the entire penguin proliferation issue by sending us, in a pre-emptive strike, a huge penguin. Some assembly required. Thank god for a bicycle pump…not what I thought I’d be doing Saturday afternoon, frankly. A lot of sweating and cursing and effort was involved. And then, especially with the hat, it looks a little like something out of Bosch! I call him “The Sinister Mr. P”. On his side it says, “Not be used as a flotation or life-saving device.” What?! You can’t use your giant penguin to float to Japan?! (Flickr photo set if you prefer–otherwise, check out photos after the cut.)

Jeff

15 comments on “Breaking News: Penguin Wars Intensify–The Arrival of the Sinister “Mr. P”

  1. Cat Sparks says:

    OMG! I used to have one of those penguins! My sister bought it for me in one of those inflight airline catalogues… I was working in the Premier’s office at the time. One day I decided to take it to work with me. It sat beside me on the bus into the city and nobody said a word. In the office I put the penguin on the premier’s chair and it ran New South Wales for 2 hours before anybody noticed…

  2. Cat! That’s hilarious!

  3. Ann VanderMeer says:

    Cat, only you could get away with that.

  4. Dude, you have carpet on a vertical surface.

  5. Yeah, just one vertical surface. And the cats love it, so it stays.

  6. Ann VanderMeer says:

    Hey. Has anyone noticed the silver spaceship behind the penguin?? What does this mean??

  7. That snazzy hat is just the right touch.

  8. Sir Tessa says:

    Pffft. When I was awarded my own giant penguin some years ago, I blew it up. WITH MY LUNGS.

  9. Ann VanderMeer says:

    Oh… we’re Americans. Much too lazy for that.

  10. Who “awarded” you a penguin? I mean, what kind of thing do you win to be “awarded” a penguin?

  11. Was it some kind of custody battle?

  12. I did notice that cool silver spaceship on the mantle! Trying to figure out if it’s from a movie or book. Or did the penguin arrive in it?

    All I can say is, if you wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of padding webbed feet, well . . . but I’m sure there’s nothing to worry about . . .

  13. The spaceship was given to us by a Romanian architect during our European book tour. If he’s reading this, he needs to get in touch, since it’d be nice to feature his work somewhere.

    Jeff

  14. Bob Lock says:

    Pffft. Inflatable penguins… not a patch on inflatable sheep. Here in Wales we are connoisseurs of inflatable sex toys…
    Umm… that is a sex toy isn’t it?

    http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p85/Bob_Lock/sheep.jpg

  15. Sir Tessa says:

    I say “awarded” because I don’t actually remember who gave it to me, or why.

    Penguins are like that. They just turn up, make themselves at home, and stare at you.

    Bob, I did mention to Jeff that he nearly got the giant inflatable red back spider, but you know, penguins….there’s a fair sized crocodile available too.

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