Archive for July, 2011

My Fungal Weapons Versus Your Dragon: Fantasy Mortal Combat

Jeff VanderMeer • July 9th, 2011 • Uncategorized

So I’m bored today. So I’m gonna ask you a question. If any fantasy/SF authors got in a battle against one another and they had to fight through proxies like weapons, allies, etc, and were able to summon up anything weapon-y from their novels, including beasties as allies, to use in that conflict…what match-ups would you find interesting, and whose weapons would help them win?

Personally, I’d like to see Pern dragons versus GRRM dragons, sand worms versus Smaug, space squid versus…something.

If everybody mentions just male authors, I’m gonna send my fungal weapons after you. And they burn.

The Journals of Doctor Mormeck (Mountain)–Entry #13

Jeff VanderMeer • July 8th, 2011 • Journals of Mormeck

whale2

Note: Been reading this serialized long story/novella? Please consider supporting a full-time writer. Paypal to vanderworld at hotmail.com. Donations above $21 will entitle you to a free copy of initial anthology or stand-alone book appearance. Context:

Living on a far-distant planet, Doctor Mormeck works for strange beings that might or might not be angels by conducting surveillance across a hundred thousand alt-Earths. When an avatar of Mormeck is sent to a war-torn winter city to investigate a mysterious Presence, the doctor will become embroiled an ever-widening conflict.

Archive is here, Journals of Mormeck, and first entry is here.

It has been five days since my last confession, father, and I have sinned…Except I don’t believe in God or priests, despite the fact Marty does, and my “father” was my mother, too, and s/he flung me out across the universe, a gigantic seed pod insulated against the vacuum, to fall where I would, my decaying orbit bringing me to this distant planet where I gradually grew into an awareness of myself…and of the angels.

Gabriel came to me not long after my last entry. He was unhappy with my surveillance progress. He seemed suspicious of my lies about why I had been unable to extract information from Marty the lighthouse keeper.

“Use the luna moths to occupy her brain. Extract any information directly from the cortex,” he told the mountain that had in fact been in full retreat from any action that might be considered invasive where Marty was concerned.

I told him I would and then Gabriel pointed out another reality nearby. “Don’t worry, Mormeck—we can always put you on another surveillance track.” This mountain had to stop from shuddering at the thought of being separated from Marty.

I knew this other reality—I had surveiled it briefly before. On that alt-Earth, a vast civilization pushed south from the Arctic, sending ahead their floating ghost-whale spirit weapons. These floating ghost-whales glided across the surface of the world and anyone they touched, anyone who came within the influence of their wallowing bodies, faded into the past of another, random reality—ceased to exist in the present. They emitted whale-song as they came, a deceptively sonorous psych-weapon that could break eardrums and brought fear to the invaders. The invaders had come from across the sea and had misjudged everything that could be misjudged. They had occupied territory and torn up the land while dismissing indigenous tech that was not inferior but simply different because it existed across dimensions, requiring only unity of purpose to bring forth. Those who retreated did so for strategic not tactical reasons. Now the invaders fell back in disarray, still unable to grasp the scope of their mistake.

But this Earth also existed in a kind of temporal hiccup where everything kept happening over and over again. The spirit-whale advance would reach a certain point, re-set, and begin again—so many times that now the commanders of the northern armies headed south, and their civilian leaders, knew like an echo of an echo in their brains what was happening—a subconscious message received from the near future—and in a thousand minute ways were intent on altering their decisions to try to effect some sort of change. Gabriel had told me that eventually the hiccup would feel the combined psychic pressure of this and it would end…but not even the angels knew if that reality would then proceed normally or cease to exist.

Sometimes the angels hid their wings and traveled there and let the spirit whales dissolve them into the past as a kind of strange jest or joke. The most adventurous would wait until the very second of the temporal hiccup before diving in, and thus be subject to any number of dangerous and random possibilities. Those who survived their comrades would find and bring back and restore their memories. It may have been meant as some kind of adventure, even some sort of rite of passage, but I thought there was a hint of desperation and sadness to it. That the angels, Gabriel included, really wanted to forget, but had to disguise that impulse as play.

But what did they need to forget? The cruelty of decisions they said they made for the greater good? Something much worse?

I am beginning to think I don’t believe in angels, either.

A Sampling of Visual Birthday Wishes: I Wish to Be Feared

Jeff VanderMeer • July 8th, 2011 • Evil Monkey

feared
(Like this image by Todd Vandemark? For liking it, you owe it to me to buy this.)

bleep
(Leah Thomas sent me this, after I questioned whether a bear hat she’d mentioned was plush or real. The offending word I crossed out for this version.)

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(Jeremy Zerfoss sent in this one because he’s nutso.)

Evil Monkey:
How was your birthday?

Jeff:
Good! I worked hard, I wrote, I played hard. I observed internet kerfuffle with wry amusement and horror, as usual. Ann bought me a nice dinner and got me a thoughtful gift. We watched House.

Evil Monkey:
I was out getting naked in bars.

Jeff:
Glad I missed that.

Lambshead Cabinet Anthology: Attack of the Clockroach!–Mike Mignola, Cherie Priest Exclusives!

Jeff VanderMeer • July 8th, 2011 • Lambshead Cabinet Features, News

As part of the pre-launch for our fiction-and-art antho The Thackery T. Lambshead Cabinet of Curiosities: Exhibits, Oddities, Images, and Stories from Top Authors and Artists, you can now read an exclusive excerpt from Cherie Priest’s story, with a reveal of Mike Mignola’s art. “The Clockroach” is one of my favorites from the anthology. Mignola created four originals for us and then gave us the names of writers he’d like to work with. Priest then wrote the story and in the process named the artifact pictured “The Clockroach”. The other three writers who created stories to Mignola art are Michael Moorcock, China Mieville, and Lev Grossman.

The excerpt shows the more serious side of the story to some extent, while in the book Priest’s frequent footnotes add darkly (and not so darkly) humorous context. And to show the synergy that sometimes occurs in these situations, the clockroach may appear in a Lambshead-related novel I’m working on in the near future.

More coverage of the anthology later today—and next week, a special, ultra-cool surprise to coincide with the official release date.

clocky
Ooooh! Could that be part of the Clockroach?!

The Thackery T. Lambshead Cabinet of Curiosities: Can Artifacts Be Disgruntled?

Jeff VanderMeer • July 7th, 2011 • Lambshead Cabinet Features, News

rikki ducornet
(Image from the “A Brief Catalog of Other Items” section of the Lambshead anthology)

HarperCollins’ link to retailers for the Lambshead Cabinet.

Today kicks off a week of blogging about the new anthology The Thackery T. Lambshead Cabinet of Curiosities, edited by Ann VanderMeer and yours truly. Contributors include Holly Black, Greg Broadmore, Ted Chiang, Amal El-Mohtar, Minister Faust, Jeffrey Ford, Lev Grossman, N.K. Jemisin, Caitlin R. Kiernan, China Mieville, Mike Mignola, Michael Moorcock, Alan Moore, Garth Nix, Naomi Novik, Cherie Priest, Ekaterina Sedia, Jan Svankmajer, Rachel Swirsky, Carrie Vaughn, Jake von Slatt, Tad Williams, Charles Yu, and tons more.

A lot of our favorite writers and artists are in this book, including the dual-threat Rikki Ducornet, an amazing surrealist writer who also paints. For the Lambshead Cabinet, she gave us a cheeky image entitled “Disgruntled Artifacts”. I’ve posted it above, and you can click on it to see it much larger.

Although Rikki’s having fun with the image, it is true that artifacts can be disgruntled, in the sense that one reason we thought a “cabinet of curiosities” concept would work is that people are attached to objects. There’s often an emotional resonance in our connection—either because of who made it or who gave it to us. There’s also the question of context—artifacts taken out of context can be harmless or fraught with echoes and linkages. You cannot see a sarcophagus in a British museum, for example, without thinking about why it’s there, how it got there, and why it isn’t somewhere else.

There are plenty of reasons for us to project “disgruntled” onto artifacts, though. Sometimes an artifact is in the wrong context to begin with—for example, “The Clockroach” in our book, story by Cherie Priest and image by Mike Mignola. That was never going to end well.

On the other hand, recontextualizations can “cook” certain types of for lack of a better term, “disgruntilization”. Russian painter Vladimir Gvozdev’s depictions of mechanical animals, two of which are included in the Lambshead Cabinet, repurpose the example of a German mechanic who lived in Russia at the beginning of the twentieth century. says Gvozdev, “After Germany’s defeat in the First World War, the mechanic went mad and was held in a lunatic asylum for life. There he began inventing vergeltungswaffe, a German term for ‘vengeance weapons.’ I never saw his blueprints, but I liked the story so much that I tried to make via my blueprints a sort of portrait of the inventor himself—to create a little museum out of the mind of that German mechanic.” The results are hybrids that take the sting out of the original idea without being any less interesting.

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(Gvozdev’s art has appeared in our Steampunk Reloaded anthology and The Steampunk Bible, in addition to the Lambshead Cabinet.)

The Journals of Doctor Mormeck’s Avatar–Entry #6

Jeff VanderMeer • July 7th, 2011 • Journals of Mormeck


(More info on this image here.)

Note: Been reading this serialized long story/novella? Please consider supporting a full-time writer. Paypal to vanderworld at hotmail.com. Donations above $21 will entitle you to a free copy of initial anthology or stand-alone book appearance. Context:

Living on a far-distant planet, Doctor Mormeck works for strange beings that might or might not be angels by conducting surveillance across a hundred thousand alt-Earths. When an avatar of Mormeck is sent to a war-torn winter city to investigate a mysterious Presence, the doctor will become embroiled an ever-widening conflict.

Archive is here, Journals of Mormeck, and first entry is here.

The political officer for Sergeant Pavlov’s platoon was named Boris Mikhailovich Bashmachkin, called something similar to “Boris the Bore” behind his back. Bashmachkin outranked Pavlov in several ways. For example, at a word to Moscow from Boris the Bore, Pavlov would find himself in front of a firing squad or sent to a work camp in the Far East.

That these eventualities were perhaps less eminent due to Pavlov’s popularity did not mean Bashmachkin couldn’t as Pavlov put it “make a nuisance of himself.” In other timelines, political officers stepped down after 1942. In this timeline, their power only expanded and broadened, until in a decade’s time they would live like despotic ticks feasting off of black-market deals for military equipment, paralyzing the battle-readiness of many units. This would lead, in part, to more famines in the 1960s and the overthrow of a by then senile and blind Trotsky, pulled unmercifully from his fortified offices in the Kremlin and, in the Red Square where he had so often performed troop reviews, torn apart by his former supporters. Several angels had attended that show, according to the records in my head, and found it “most entertaining.”

“Yes, Mormeck,” Pavlov said experimentally, for I had just recently revealed my name. “He is a nuisance. He makes my men nervous. He wants kickbacks from me in return for not pursuing their ideological crimes. Yes, my men curse too much. Yes, I find their little stage productions with bits of sausage for puppets odd and confusing. But I ask you, Mormeck: wouldn’t you engage in black humor if you had a mound of dead Germans to look at every night? And an ocean of live ones to fend off each morning? And how am I to get you what you want if this Boris is always in the way?”

“How long did you practice that speech?” I asked him.

“Only for a few minutes while I shaved this morning,” Pavlov replied, a secret amusement revealed mostly through his eyes.

“What do you need from me?”

“Did I mention the tea party? I am throwing a tea party. For Boris. Perhaps you could attend if your social calendar is open?”

(more…)

It’s My Birthday Already! (Somewhere)…And: All I Want for My Birthday Is…

Jeff VanderMeer • July 6th, 2011 • Culture

Let’s get this out of the way first…my birthday is July 7…and honestly I don’t want nuthin’ from nobody…except one little thing. If you want to get something for me—buy The Thackery T. Lambshead Cabinet of Curiosities fiction and art anthology for yourself…and for some friends. It’s available for a sick steep discount on Amazon at the moment. You can skim downriver on this blog to see more info on the antho, or look at this amazing contributor list: Holly Black, Greg Broadmore, Ted Chiang, John Coulthart, Rikki Ducornet, Amal El-Mohtar, Minister Faust, Jeffrey Ford, Lev Grossman, N.K. Jemisin, Caitlin R. Kiernan, China Mieville, Mike Mignola, Michael Moorcock, Alan Moore, Garth Nix, Naomi Novik, Helen Oyeyemi, J.K. Potter, Cherie Priest, Ekaterina Sedia, Jan Svankmajer, Rachel Swirsky, Carrie Vaughn, Jake von Slatt, Tad Williams, Charles Yu, and more!

…now that I’ve dispensed with that essential information—yes, it’s true, I’ve hit the ripe old age of 43. I’m one year dumber, creakier, crankier, less productive, and all of the other things that happen when your body begins to decide it’s a slide downhill…except it doesn’t really feel like that.

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The Cabinet of Curiosities 2011 Summer Tour: Ann & Jeff VanderMeer

Jeff VanderMeer • July 6th, 2011 • News

AnnJeffVanderMeer

We’re going on the road! Below find the details on our summer appearances. Expect fun, fun, and more fun…

The Book

“The narrative scope and stellar assemblage of writers and illustrators…makes this a book that will be absolutely cherished by fantasy, science fiction, and steampunk afficionados alike.” – Paul Goat Allen, B&N Book Club, on The Thackery T. Lambshead Cabinet of Curiosities

Hugo Award winner Ann VanderMeer and World Fantasy Award winner Jeff VanderMeer will be touring this summer and fall promoting The Thackery T. Lambshead Cabinet of Curiosities, a unique blend of fiction and images. Debuting in early July, the Cabinet of Curiosities just made the LA Times summer recommended reading list and includes amazing new fiction and art by Hellboy creator Mike Mignola, Alan Moore, China Mieville, Lev Grossman, Holly Black, Naomi Novik, and more. Also featuring The Steampunk Bible, a coffee table book about the popular subgenre (cowritten with Selena Chambers), has received raves around the world, including on Wired.com and is featured at the British Museum.

The Events

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(Poster by Jeremy Zerfoss.)
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The Journals of Doctor Mormeck (Mountain)–Entry #12

Jeff VanderMeer • July 6th, 2011 • Journals of Mormeck

drMormeckmoali
(Mo Ali’s awesome visualization of Doctor Mormeck.)

Note: Been reading this serialized long story/novella? Consider supporting a full-time writer. Paypal to vanderworld at hotmail.com. Donations above $21 will entitle you to a free copy of initial anthology or stand-alone book appearance. Context:

Living on a far-distant planet, Doctor Mormeck works for strange beings that might or might not be angels by conducting surveillance across a hundred thousand alt-Earths. When an avatar of Mormeck is sent to a war-torn winter city to investigate a mysterious Presence, the doctor will become embroiled an ever-widening conflict.

Archive is here, Journals of Mormeck, and first entry is here.

Everything that rises must resolve. But when I drift, I drift, and a mountain can drift for a long time. A mountain can drift and still function. This language cannot convey the concept so I must repeat, must keep trying in different ways. I drift, I resolve, I fold inward while turning outward. No, it’s no use.

I have continued my surveillance of Marty the lighthouse keeper and the lighthouse itself over the past couple of weeks. I find my cycles of coming down here to the jungle floor to write take ever greater effort, in no small part because Gabriel seems intent on watching me more closely than before. I don’t know what this signifies.

Marty and the lighthouse. I knew very early on that this daily routine of walking around the back and kissing a stranger meant something—some kind of code, some kind of message—and that the answer lay in the exchange itself. Something was being communicated, and to find out what I needed to get inside of their mouths, specifically inside of Marty’s mouth. I knew this too because although I activated the luna moths’ infra-red, x-ray, and other sensory apparatus…at the moment at which lips locked the insides of their mouths went blurry, unseeable. Something was blocking me out.

(more…)

Are You a Librarian Who Blogs? Would You Like a Signed Cabinet of Curiosities?

Jeff VanderMeer • July 5th, 2011 • News

We love librarians—for one thing they always know how to have a good time, for another we always learn something when we hang out with them at ALA or other conferences.

So we’re making a special offer for librarians in the United States only (for now): if you’re a librarian and you blog about YA and/or adult books—either for a national or regional library website, or have a following on your personal blog—we’d like to send you a free copy of The Thackery Cabinet of Curiosities, signed by both of us editor-types. Offer good for the first ten to respond. Preferably, send us an email at vanderworld at hotmail.com with the URL of the relevant website, although you can post below too as a back-up if you like. All you have to do in return is promise you’ll try to blog about the book if you like it.

The cabinet, released soon, is an LA Times recommended summer reading selection that features over 60 pieces of art as well as all-new fiction. Contributors include Holly Black, Greg Broadmore, Ted Chiang, John Coulthart, Rikki Ducornet, Amal El-Mohtar, Minister Faust, Jeffrey Ford, Lev Grossman, N.K. Jemisin, Caitlin R. Kiernan, China Mieville, Mike Mignola, Michael Moorcock, Alan Moore, Garth Nix, Naomi Novik, James A. Owen, Helen Oyeyemi, J.K. Potter, Cherie Priest, Ekaterina Sedia, Jan Svankmajer, Rachel Swirsky, Carrie Vaughn, Jake von Slatt, Tad Williams, Charles Yu, and many more.