World Fantasy Convention 2009: Renouncing Squid, Celebrating Last Drink, Gator Heads, and Embracing Phantasmagorical Noir

Jeff VanderMeer • October 17th, 2009 @ 10:59 pm • News, Uncategorized

Yes, it is true, I have chosen to renounce squid, and figure being a GoH with Ann at World Fantasy means that’s as good a place as any to formally go through with the related procedures and documentation, as noted below.

I’ve also posted my schedule and Ann’s below. I haven’t listed other participants on panels or the descriptions since I don’t know if there might be changes in those areas. But this should be our schedule. (Will post changes should any occur.)

Note: If the Finns later force me to unrenounce squid, I may have to do so. Their fu is strong, and their mafia stronger.


***

THURSDAY, Oct. 29th

5:00 PM—Opening Ceremonies.

8:00 to whenever it ends—Last Drink Bird Head Party, International Parlor, 20th floor. This awesome event will include presenting the LDBH awards and give-aways, and over 20 contributors attending, while also celebrating the release of Finch and Booklife. I will throw a (not real) bird head. Highly recommended. (And huge thanks to Andrew and Kevin and Rina and the other folks on the ground helping with this party!)

FRIDAY, Oct. 30

11:00 AM—VanderMeer on VanderMeer. This isn’t as bawdy as it sounds. We’ll be interviewing each other, as two of the guests of honor. Neither will have seen the questions ahead of time, so…it could get very interesting, heh heh…Oh, yes, and we will reveal the secrets of the universe. SO BE THERE.

2:00 PM—Fantasy in Translation. Ann’s on this panel, which will unravel foreign mysteries.

2:00 PM—Non-Conciliatory Fantasy. I’m on this one, about bad, bad, terrible people doing all kinds of ‘orrible things, and a shooting on stage, during the panel, and arguing with other panelists who are bad bad people. Gritty and narsty and you’re going to want to wear kevlar and spread sawdust on the floor.

8:00 PM—Group Autographing. Ann and I will probably be there toward the beginning and middle or end, as we have a prior commitment in the, er, near-beginning. We will draw dirigibles if possible. Perhaps even blimps and, er, cats with hats, and one last squid or two. We are your servants.

SATURDAY, Oct. 31

10:00 AM—Why Steampunk Now? Ann’s on this one. The answer has been rated classified, eyes only, by the U.S. government.

11:00 to 2:00 PM—Wherever there is football coverage, I want to be there.

2:00 PM—What We Read Just for Fun. Read? For…fun? When was this, again? A couple years ago? I don’t remember.

3:00 to 4:00 PM—Wherever there is football coverage, I want to be there.

4:00 PM—Reading. During this event, I will formally renounce squid for all time, and embrace visionary, phantasmagorical noir. Including requisite anecdotes and recountings of bizarre true life squid events, as well as a reading from Finch. Not to be missed, unless you have to miss it.

5:00 PM to 10:00 PM—Top sekrit activities as well as I want to be where football is. Bar? Baaaarrr?

10:00 PM—Weird Tales Party. Ann and Stephen’s awesome party gig with professional entertainment, a midnight convocation (I am apparently reading for one minute). I will be wearing a tux and a gator head.

SUNDAY, Nov. 1

4:30 AM–Join me in the gym for some slurred ruminations on Booklife and circuit training. I will be wearing a tux and a gator head.

1:00 PM—World Fantasy Awards and Banquet. Jay Lake and I will be giving each other pedicures during this event. It is during the banquet, at some key moment during the proceedings, that I will rise from my chair and shout “I RENOUNCE SQUID.” Probably during the winner’s speech in the anthology category.

MONDAY, Nov. 2

8:00 AM—Trundled into a limo for relocation under the witness protection program so the Giant Squid doesn’t find me.

13 Responses to “World Fantasy Convention 2009: Renouncing Squid, Celebrating Last Drink, Gator Heads, and Embracing Phantasmagorical Noir”

  1. Larry says:

    Hrmm…I see the World’s Largest Cocktail Party starts at 3:30 EDT (or 12:30 PM in San Diego), so it sounds like you might have some worries…except UGA doesn’t seem to be that good this year. I mean, if Crompton looked like the ghost of Manning out there against their D, think Tebow and Co. might have some fun?

    Would love to be at that convention, though, but maybe in a year or two?

  2. Erin says:

    Nooooooo the squid, who will protect them now? Soon there will be sperm whales on your website, and there will be no joy left in the world.

    The “why steampunk now?” session sounds especially cool. Wish we had managed to nab last minute passes. EV will be there, too. :(

  3. Hellbound Heart says:

    you may be renouncing squid but don’t think that’ll be reciprocal….the name vandermeer is too ingrained in the squid collective unconscious to be erased……

    peace and love…..

  4. Justin Pickard says:

    8:00 AM—Trundled into a limo for relocation under the witness protection program so the Giant Squid doesn’t find me.

    Of course, now you’ve announced it on the internet, he’s probably already looking. Stay alert, VanderMeer.

  5. Cheryl says:

    Um, Jeff, we have had a number of the local Humboldt squid buy memberships just so that they could meet you…

  6. jeff vandermeer says:

    Cheryl: I didn’t know it was going to be such a rough crowd.

  7. Jay Lake: [links] Link salad’s dam breaks open many years too soon says:

    [...] Jeff VanderMeer’s WFC Schedule — This post is a thing of beauty and a joy forever. [...]

  8. Cheryl says:

    Jeff: It won’t be too bad. All of the really rough squid will be down in San Diego over the weekend for the Raiders – Chargers game.

  9. Jeff VanderMeer says:

    Well, there is that, at least. LOL.

  10. Steve Buchheit says:

    The Giant Squid, just like Santa Claus, always knows.

  11. Johanna Vainikainen-Uusitalo says:

    “Note: If the Finns later force me to unrenounce squid, I may have to do so. Their fu is strong, and their mafia stronger.”

    Consider it noted, sir!

  12. Annmarie Zepf says:

    Hello, I really like the design of your site. What design are you using?

  13. Lenore Dedman says:

    Ah! This is awesome! Many thanks for countering severalsome misconceptions I had witnessed about this as of late.

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