ROOF CRUTCH (to go with Traveling Neighbor Morgue)

Jeff VanderMeer • September 17th, 2009 @ 8:15 am • Culture

You might remember my post about the traveling morgue show that used to stop by our neighborhood

Well, now, on the other side of our corner lot, there’s this…

ROOF CRUTCHES! Been there for about a month now. Words like why? come to mind. I will investigate further…

15 Responses to “ROOF CRUTCH (to go with Traveling Neighbor Morgue)”

  1. Ann VanderMeer says:

    Yes… this used to be a nice family-oriented neighborhood. I have no idea what’s going on now.

  2. Jeff VanderMeer says:

    The neighborhood is fine–and these neighbors are fine, too. The crutches are just a bit weird.

  3. David Moles says:

    Now it’s a nice Addams-family-oriented neighborhood.

  4. Jeff VanderMeer says:


  5. kellys says:

    I now have an urge to watch Tom Hanks’ campy The Burbs.

  6. SMD says:

    This is why you are a writer. Go write a story about this and get it published :P.

  7. Jeff VanderMeer says:

    No, I’m reporting on it precisely because I *won’t* be writing a story about it.

  8. Seth Merlo says:

    Maybe they put them up there in case they need to work on the roof one day, and ALSO happen to have a broken leg… you know, just to be prepared.

  9. Steve Buchheit says:

    Obviously it’s an offering to the Gods. It’s either a “thank you, I no longer need them” (if your gods happen to be nice ones), or “please curse those who oppose me” (if they’re no so nice).

    Florida still has a big Santeria crowd, doesn’t it?

  10. brendan connell says:

    They are there in case you fall onto the roof and break your leg.

  11. Matt Staggs says:

    The hillbillies who owned our house first left a pair of crutches in my storeroom. I’ll send them to you if you want to erect a similar display at your own house.

  12. Jeff VanderMeer says:

    That kind of escalation leads to bloodshed and madness, Matt. You know it does. You go from living in a quiet neighborhood to having the starring role in a really twisted Joe R. Lansdale story…

  13. Doreen says:

    Sigh…it’s so obvious. A cripple has been HEALED! And in his or her elation threw the crutches on the roof needing them no more.

  14. Hellbound Heart says:

    …they’re not crutches, they’re actually modified ski poles for slalem-ing down your roof……..and on to a trampoline……and on to the roof of your neighbour’s car……

    peace and love……

  15. GlenH says:

    It’s only a matter of time before your neighbors start to wonder why this strange guy keeps taking pictures of their houses and cars and some twisted, suburban version of Spy vs Spy ensues.

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