Ninja# b. Return fire with a dramatic stare made entirely more menacing in your ninja mask.
The cowboy narrows his eyes further still, which makes him look like he’s been squirted with lemon juice. You raise your eyebrows. He raises his, and realise he has no practice doing so, narrows his eyes again. Now that you’ve had time to study it, you realise he isn’t very good at the stare, either. This would be why he’s a shopping trolley cowboy.
He releases the reigns of his trolley snake, and they roll away unheeded. He drops his hand to the holster at his hip. You tense, ready and waiting.
Before you can act, a second trolley snake comes charging in and smashes into the cowboy with such force he’s crushed against the wall. Something crunches audibly on impact. He gurgles once, and dies.
Oh.
Well then.
You turn from him, intending to head into the store, but are confronted by a second cowboy. Who is also dead, quite obviously so. You can tell from all the bits sticking out. This cowboy lets out a terribly, mindless and chilling moan.
“Braaaaaaaaaaaains.â€
It shambles towards you, arms outstretched, eager to slurp your thinking muscle up.
a. Climb!
b. Er, I think they have some brains in the store, I’ll just go check for you…
c. QUICK DRAW SHURIKEN!
October 14, 2008 at 5:59 pm
b)! Bothering with a zombie is totally not cool. They’re too easy prey, so it wouldn’t be honorable. ‘sides, we were heading to the store anyway.
October 14, 2008 at 6:50 pm
b) Cause you could probably lose him in the meat section. And then wait for him, ninja like, with a concealed eggplant.
October 14, 2008 at 8:47 pm
c) SHURIKEN TIME BABY! (But, I remember that old eighties records work just as good, and you can get rid of all those nasty old mistakes that way. I bet CDs work just as well. For instance, one Christmas, my brother got 3 Vanilla Ice CDs as gifts. That’s the kind of armament that comes in handy against brain-sucking zombies.)
October 15, 2008 at 4:00 am
c) Chuck the shuriken I found in a packet of Froot Loops that fell off the shelf. It says “magic shuriken” on the packet — or I think it does, though I’m not entirely au fait with English.
October 15, 2008 at 7:17 am
(b) Even if it’s a particularly clever zombie and relises that the only brains in a supermarket belong to sheep it probably isn’t to picky about its food.
October 15, 2008 at 9:04 am
—-cut