Evil Monkey’s Vamp Pyres of the Intertubes

O gather close old friend
I have a tale of woe for you:
It was a [cliched and stereotypical] night
and somewhere someone was typing a rant
about wasting your time posting rants.

Ooo–scary. A single click lay between me
and some awfully weird text laid out in frightening
1980s-style Web Master centered Gravitas
(not a font, Fred).

As my eyes became coated with overblown
and obvious extended metaphor
I could feel myself losing some essential
element of creativity
and came here to tell you
about it at a time when I was too
tired to write my own fiction.

In the deep of night
daily you will rise
preened for today’s bon mot
but be strong
resist the siren call
that mixes your vampire metaphor
with some other myth.

O My Dearest Ancestral Writer Friend
calm that fiend within yer foetid breast.

Blog not! Blog naught! Blog gnat!

Noooooooooo…not that.

[Expiring with blush of anguish and hand held up to head
in languished purple Heathcliff moment…]

One comment on “Evil Monkey’s Vamp Pyres of the Intertubes

  1. Larry says:

    Nice. Wuthering Heights mixed into a cautionary tale, with free verse thrown into the mix. This one also approves of this post.

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