Weird Tales: chiles samaniego on Guest Blogging

Writer: chiles samaniego
Weird Tales Story: Time and the Orpheus (Issue #352, Sept/Oct 2008)
Writer Bio: When asked to write about himself, chiles samaniego enjoys using lower case letters and the third person; “Easier to make things up about me that way,” he says. As a writer of fictions, he wonders if everything he writes might be true, and therefore not to be trusted.


Right. Guest blogging. When Ann asked if i would be interested in guest blogging, i exercised some restraint, flexed some prodigiously underused mental muscles to hold back the WillSmithian “Aw Heil Naw!” (that meant yes, by the by, just so we’re clear) that Ann’s email had sent bouncing around the inside of my skull, and replied, “Yes. Very. Interested.” or something equally autonomic. But then, of course, i had to sit down and actually write the thing. Horrors: i had no idea what i might write about. i was facing the Dread Blank Page (only slightly less notorious than the Dread Pirate Roberts, unless you’re from Florin where it seems virtually unknown), that pale-eyed monster writers are so familiar with, and of which many have written long and lengthily and with A Great Many Words.

So i cheated and took a peak at what was already up from my fellow guests. My heart sank even further. Here: as i write, a separate browser window is open on Jeff’s ‘Ecstatic Days’; on it are two previous entries by Cat Rambo and Israeli writer Nir Yaniv. Cat has written a personal account of her early adventures in reading, and Nir has provided some very interesting insights into the life of genre literature in his home country. What’s more, i see by the writing on the blog that both writers have credentials: you can trust what they have to say; those two, they know what they’re talking about. Me, all i tend to be is opinionated. Not even that, sometimes.

As a guest blogger, i find myself obligated to say something: a) interesting; b) useful; c) not stupid. i must find a way, dear reader, to keep you interested and learning and being made smarter by reading this blog while our host the Amazing Jeff is away saving the world by catching those Evil Deadlines (so i hear). So here, say i: go read Cat’s and Nir’s and whoever else’s who has anything up by the time this makes its way to the web page, go read their posts instead. You will no doubt be interested, find something useful, and not be rendered dumber than you would otherwise have been; might, in fact, learn something, be made smarter.

Still here? i see. Well, truth be told, i was rather hoping you’d stick around.

What can i say that might be a), b) or c)? i suppose, like Nir, the best thing to do would be to try to paint you a picture of what it’s like to be an SF writer back home (in the Philippines, in case you missed that bit). Only i’m entirely the wrong person to ask. The wrong person entirely. Firstly, my experience with Filipino literature is very limited, and of my encounters with the milieu and with people in the milieu, it’s very probable that my experience conforms to my own abilities and inabilities as a social being rather than being an honest reflection of the way things stand. Secondly, well, this may get a bit hairy, but i’m not really sure i’m an SF writer to begin with. Don’t get me wrong, i love me some SF, i grew up on it. It’s just that i don’t think the things i’ve been writing lately are built to do what SF stories are “supposed” to do.

(Rrrrrright. Step away from the big red button. Red flag on that last statement. Slowly, slowly…take one step back…another…and another…and we’re clear.)

What i mean to say is (D-oh!) i’m just not sure what kind of writer i am, period. (Okay, are you done?) It just seems to me that mmmf……mfmfmf…

(One moment please. We are experiencing technical difficulties. Please stand by.)
We regret to inform you that chiles samaniego will not be able to continue this blog-post. We apologize for the inconvenience. Stay tuned for further developments.

Er, we’ll clean all this up for you. These Agents of Chaos. What’ll you do?

(Editor’s Note: Despite the ramblings, his fiction is brilliant, as you will soon see….)